I am finding it very interesting to watch the reaction to Wings. I like to write close to the edge, to provoke responses based on emotion. I am not a gentle writer; I tend to want to explore the darkness within people’s minds, the things they do based on cultural acceptance. So many things we do reflect the attitudes of those around us, rather than our own deep beliefs. Sex and sexuality is one of the most powerful forces in history. It has provoked wars and brought peace, it has brought people to the heights of understanding and the depths of depravity. I write of those people who are real. They are not good, nor are they totally bad. Just like us. No one and I mean no one, on this earth, is entirely good or bad. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE has elements of both within them, despite what they might believe to the contrary. That simply makes us people. We are here to learn, not to be perfect. I like some of my characters to begin as doing things that we are not comfortable with, to stretch our acceptance of him. When readers do not like or trust the character to begin with, that is what I am seeking. But like people in real life, I like to believe that there can be redemption, that that person can come to a higher understanding and realize that their behaviours are hurtful to others, that there is always another way. By the end of the book, I hope that people begin to understand the character a little even if they cannot like him. What is acceptable? That is based on our culture at the time. If you look through history, it is interesting to see the different levels of acceptance that have existed. Times when women were powerful, times when men ruled totally. Times when sexuality was open and free and times when it was brutally repressed. Times when men loving men was so common, no one would have even thought to comment on it. (How I wish that openness could again exist here. Despite all our protestations of acceptance, that seems far away.) I don’t pretend to understand it all. I simply explore the way that people view themselves and those around them in sexual terms. Slavery makes people uncomfortable, as it should. Certainly in this day and age we understand and abhor such a thing, but even now it exists. Just because it makes us uncomfortable does not make it disappear. There will always be those who take advantage of others. What I write about is the existence of such things, but that the characters, despite their upbringing and culture, begin to realize the wrongness, the fact that the one they treat so harshly is a person, a being in their own right. They deserve to be loved for themselves, not for what they may or may not be able to give their master. My books are not comfortable. I don’t want them to be. I want people to question, to understand how these things damage a person’s mind more than their body. How one can be sucked into a relationship based on sex and one sided love. If it ended there, how very empty that would end up being. If it was not for the master coming to his senses, this in no way would be a happy ending. Instead it would be more like the hell that abused spouses, male and female, go through. There is no happy ending there, only endurance and misery. That is a form of slavery in its own right, and we ignore it every day. When my books end, it is with the understanding that the characters will have much to work on. As with reality, their relationship will not be without effort and mishaps. Damage has been done and only with love and patience will that be healed. We often hurt others; the important part is how we handle that. Do we walk away and refuse responsibility or do we realize that we have a duty to right a wrong? People are so very complicated. There are endless responses to what we read and view and experience. That is what makes us so interesting. When we have a very deep response to something, that is often a sign that there is a problem, in issue we have to address. That is when we have to face it, not tuck it away and hide from the discomfort. Once we bring it into the light, stop hiding from it, then we can begin to heal it. That has happened so often in my life. I did not even know there WAS a problem, and then, suddenly, something triggered a powerful response and there it was. An issue I did not even realize existed. Then I had to take each one out and examine it, try to understand it. The hardest thing to face in life is ourselves. We are afraid of what is in us, when really it is all the things we have collected over time. It needs to be faced and only then will it begin to lose its power over us. Each book I write comes from somewhere deep inside, somewhere that needs to tell that story. I have written so many books that have never been published and probably never will. They are far, far more uncomfortable than any I have shown. Call it catharsis. I write angst and always will. Some more so than others, but always I need to take the character to the depths so he can rise again. Most of all, I hope to appeal to emotion, good or bad, because that is what life is about.
Now, after all that pontificating, I am quite exhausted and I still have to give news ; ) “Wishes†is on the back burner for now. I need to do a major re-write, so…instead I just handed in a new book, “The Emperor’s Wolfâ€. At this time I do not know when it might come out, but I will keep you posted. The second book in the world of “Gaven†is going well and I hope to have it finished sometime in January. The title will be “Gaven: The Bonding.†I also just started another book based in the same world, but much, much earlier. It is the story of Vlar’s father, Sadan, and his love of a draconian warrior. Title not yet known. These two are definitely NOT victims…although they just might kill each other!! One day I WILL write Vlar’s story (as per many requests) but I thought I would start earlier. Another book soon to be finished, is “Takenâ€, a contemporary story of Kirith and Landon. Landon is a young mercenary who tries to kidnap Kirith, the son of a mob boss. They come to an “arrangement†that promises trouble to them both.
I hope that all of you survive the silly season reasonably intact and come out full of turkey or whatever tickles your tummy! Take Care J.C.
