As I have noted in some of my comments, this time has been both a blessing and a curse. Watching events unfold, and hearing so many horror stories from readers, authors and publishers over ARE’s moral and financial collapse, it made me sit back and take stock of things. Of what had happened, how I felt about continuing in this ebook industry, where it is all too easy for sales numbers to be fudged. I think there needs to be more accountability, in my humble opinion.
But beyond that, it brought me in a circle, back to where I started writing and why. I wrote because I always had, even as a child. It is as natural to me as breathing and as important to my well being. It has empowered me, in shedding harmful emotions through the magic of words, to create worlds and characters who went through terrible things, and yet, came out the other side triumphant, battered, bruised but with hope.
Like me.
If that is me, then I cannot let these recent events destroy what I do, how I express myself. Writing is not a job to me, it IS me. Therefore, to let others take that away is pure foolishness. I am stronger than that.
The blessing is that I have heard so many comments from fans and readers, who have taken the time to let me know they support me, that they enjoy the stories and it gives them pleasure. If this had not happened, would I have realized that to this extent?
So a silver lining brings me back to why I write. I love reading about characters who go through terrible things and come out the other side, and it was hard to find stories that went deep enough in emotional darkness to suit me. So I wrote stories involving such things, and found others who loved what I did. I could share and it was wonderful in a way I had never encountered before. I love to see people truly “get” what I am writing about.
And it is those people who have sent such kind and total support.
In light of that, how can I quit? I have to go back to my roots and remember why I am writing at all.
Strange, that today, after realizing all this, I have written non-stop, my muse up and running in full force.
Perhaps that was what this mess was meant for.
Thank you to all those lovely souls who wrote to me, both privately and on my blog. Your comments were taken to heart. Any future works are dedicated to all of you.
Be kind. Remember your words and actions echo through those you encounter daily. The smallest gesture or word can lift someone to glorious heights or break them entirely.
Take care of each other.
J.C.